POETRY: My Motivation

MY MOTIVATION

Dedicated to my cousin serving in the Navy - Michael Moore...hope he loves it!

I remember when we were little kids and things used to get out of hand,

yeah you got your share of whippings but now that little boy has grown into a man.  

I see you now as a father,

for your kids you do everything a parent should do.

You sacrifice and you do hard things, it's about doing what you have to.

I imagine it was hard to get on that plane yet again,

But you’ll be back soon...stay prayed up my dear friend.

As of late, we’ve become closer you’ve helped me through some 

really tough times.

So as I go through my days, you’ll always be on my mind.

As I come home, as I near about go insane, about stupid things that cause me so much pain,

I’ll think about you, I’ll think about my soldier.

That man who is no longer a little boy,

Serving this great nation, so we can do the things we enjoy.

But, I hope you find rest in the fact that I am so proud,

You know me and my big mouth, Ima go to the mountaintop and scream that so loud!

My cousin with such strength and such determination

All I wanna do is be like you!

Man, you got that Nike type mentality -  Just DO IT.

You got that Martin Luther King Jr. type mentality,

because you have a dream.

It’s funny because you even got that Malcolm X type mentality,

especially if people mess with me.

“By any means necessary” you would do what you would have to do for me,

You love to protect my heart.

That’s why I love you cuzzo, you are my motivation

And I can’t wait to see you after this time we spend apart.

-Brittney S. Knox

"If We Faint Not"

There’s something about life that when things get very hard, very out of our element or even mentally challenging, the destructive thoughts of doubt begin to enter our circle. I think about this statement in relation to my current weight loss journey. As of late, there has been a spirit of “I’m tired” on my heart as I get some close to a milestone. 

The Motivation in this Minute is found in Galatians 6:9 and it says, “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” The scripture says…”if we faint not”…how do we execute that level of faith? For me, simply put – it’s remembering the things God has already done in my life and the lives of others and trusting that he wouldn’t allow me to water a crop and not allow for things to GROW. 

Just waiting patiently on my harvest! And, the fact my faith knows there WILL be a harvest is pleasing to God. 

He Continues to Propel You Higher

POST 1: Motivation in a Minute: 

He Continues to Propel You Higher

"When I started this weight loss journey a year ago, to get to this point seemed impossible. I didn't realize I was over 100 pounds overweight at only 24 years old. If I continued along the path I was on, there was no way I would be able to chase my children across the park. To me, my weight was something people had to accept right? Since I was a beautiful spirit, I would just rest on that. I would just rest on being intelligent and kind and that would get me through. The motivation in this minute post is that when you start something - look ahead to the destination because it seems impossible upon the start, but once you get to where you are trying to go, you see the amazing Glory of God as he continues to propel you even higher." I started at 281 pounds and now I am over 60 pounds down and my goal was only 30. The current journey is to enter the UNDER 200 CLUB! I didn't think this was possible...you have to take the limits off God. Do that and see what happens...

For more motivation, continue reading... 

Just a bit of the backstory. Last January, I began my weight loss journey with a local personal trainer here in Winston-Salem. I walked in nearly 100 pounds overweight, weighing in at 281 pounds at 24 years old. Through numerous hours of sweat, pain, joy and fun, I write this post weighing 217 pounds, a loss of nearly 64 pounds. The accomplishment isn't so much in the number as it is the mental transformation of myself as a more confident young woman who is prepared to lead a life striving to exceed and constantly better herself in all areas. 

There is a weight loss goal that I have and honestly, when I started this journey I didn’t realize that I was over 100 pounds overweight. It took all my life to get to the point where I had absolutely no control over the things I decided to put in my mouth. I had control over other areas. I could sit in any classroom and dissect any essay, perform any math problem or speak publicly before thousands. But, I was always a plus sized kid, wouldn't I always be that way? Isn't what's on the inside the only thing that matters anyway? 1 Corinthians 6:19 answers this : "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own. (ESV)" We have to protect our bodies - mind, body and soul because we are not our own, these bodies were given to us to not abuse but treasure.  

I remember when I graduated college and moved to a small, loving town called Demopolis, Alabama. Demopolis fell in the heart of Blackbelt Alabama, among a host of cities that were considered some of the poorest areas in the state. While I was chasing my dream of being a journalist, I battled depression. The depression was so serious to the point where no one had any idea of the story behind my smile. I don’t know how I kept my smile despite the battles I was facing internally, but that’s another story for another day. Anyways, I bring that up to say during the time I battled depression I began to eat uncontrollably. I lost myself.

After being so successful academically, I thought I could rely on that. I thought if I was a good Christian woman who excelled academically and was driven in her career then my life would be just fine. I knew I needed something more. I couldn’t walk up the stairs and talk to a coworker without being out of breath. I remember the times when I walked up the stairs in my office and had to stand at the top of the stairs to catch my breath before I went in to talk to the managers. There was no part of me that knew how much me being out of shape could affect the dream I chased to be a writer. I began to realize these things and knew something had to change. The story began with these realizations and the story continues...

*NEXT POST COMING SOON* Hope you enjoyed my first edition of Motivation in a Minute! 

My Heart is the Canvas

My Heart is the Canvas

I will always be able to paint the picture even if my memory fades.

You were the Da Vinci painting on the canvas of my heart your very own Mona Lisa – and to see you again, my soul waits.

You wouldn’t want me to cry, tears only would blemish this beautiful creation.

Through careful observation, I realized it was a picture filled with memories.

Memories of my uncle, such a dear friend.

Someone who was so proud of me, from beginning to end.

I will never forget him saying “Brit, I look at your picture every day on the wall.”

Who would’ve thought it was that same third grade picture of me with big teeth,

twists in my hair and glasses big enough to look into anyone’s soul.  

I should have got you a new picture – the one with a new smile and this confidence that holds stories untold.  

There’s nothing like a memory, those that you keep in your heart.

From talking about metal recycling to remembering you picking me up in your arms, when I was only “knee high to a grasshopper”

You loved me then, you love me still.

So this picture I paint of you,

I know in the painting there is a cradle and a grave.

Because as living humans, that scene is in everyone’s art gallery.

Even though, you are on the grave part…

The beautiful memories in between that shape your painting only,

Is what I will forever keep in my heart. 

Dedicated to: Shedrick Willie Knox, Jr. 1972-2015

Until We Meet Again...

Until We Meet Again...

Dedicated to - A young girl named Belle, who lost the battle against cancer. I never met her face to face but I feel as though I know her spirit. She was related to a great mentor in my life and my mentor started an email blast to update Belle's prayer warriors about her condition. I wrote this when I found out Belle had been called home to get her angel wings. 

My eyes are only the telescope peeking in on the big screen production of your life,

you may think how can she learn anything simply from the gentle email Belle’s aunt took time to write.

My life has been forever changed by someone I’ve never met -

she’s made me think twice before dwelling on life’s complaints and yesterday’s regrets.

She fought sickness with such spunk, with a smile that could beat cancer itself

and tells jokes that brought joy that could make your heart just melt.

Through it all, surgeries and even despite the loss of her hearing,

she continued to hear God and stay in that fighter mode -

teaching those even multiples of her age

lessons far wiser than she’ll ever know.

Any loss may bring tears,

but peace comes when we think about where angels go.

We can still hear her laugh and see that smile,

as she is probably playing with her halo.

What a blessing to be taught courage & the power of prayer,

something we all needed to learn.

From an angel God let us borrow,

who he has now called to return.

With us still here on Earth, we keep alive sweet Belle’s story -

which teaches far more than any of us may ever comprehend.

But, I do know this…

Though I have never seen you with my eyes,

I’ve seen your spirit so I say rest in peace my sweet friend.

I’ll introduce myself when the time comes,

so save me a pair of angel wings for until we meet again.

- Brittney Knox

RISING JOY: Friends, family honor Maya Angelou in ceremony

From the program booklet: Celebration of Life ceremony

The black and white keys of the piano and the strings of violins filled Wait Chapel with music as friends and family gathered to remember mother, sister, friend and teacher Maya Angelou.

First-lady Michelle Obama, former president Bill Clinton, and long time friend Oprah Winfrey were among attendees in the front row to honor Angelou with colorful stories and reflections.

Angelou is a renaissance figure who died May 28 at the age of 86. She died after a life of many notable accomplishments including her role in civil rights and as winner of the Presidential Medal of Freedom award. She was honored on Saturday, June 7 at Wake Forest University during a 10 a.m. ceremony that lasted around two and a half hours. 

“There is no mourning here, there is no mourning,” her son, Guy Johnson spoke about the passing of his mother. His grandson accompanied him to the microphone stand. “We have added to the population of angels.”

His words spoke about how humanity and the planet Earth can use the works of everyone that can carry on the legacy of his mother. He talked of how his mom left this Earth in her sleep on May 28 after a battle with respiratory failure.

“She has left each one of us with something in our hearts,” he said after he released a sigh filled with emotion.

The ceremony began with words from Angelou’s grandson, Elliott Jones, reciting words from Angelou’s famous poem, “Still I Rise.”

Friends Cicely Tyson, Oprah and singers BB and Marvin Winans took to the podium to remember their friend Angelou through song and reflections.

“We celebrate one of the greatest spirits the world has ever known,” Michelle Obama says about Angelou.

The first lady spoke right after BB Winans and his brother Marvin Winans moved the crowd to the gospel song, “Stand.”

Other songs sang at the celebration of life ceremony included, “I Hope you Dance,” “Just a Closer Walk with Thee,” “God Put a Rainbow in the Clouds” and “Remember Me.”

Angelou’s pastor Dr. Serenus Churn of Mt. Zion Baptist Church in Winston-Salem gave the message that was taken from Proverbs 31:10: Who can find a virtuous woman?

He took this scripture and noted that as The Bible sparked this question he wanted to describe how he would dare to nominate Angelou as a virtuous woman for reasons as her strong faith and desire to give.

Oprah fought back tears as she spoke of her prominent relationship with Angelou and she recalled a conversation with her "sister-friend."

“I remember when I was about to open my school in South Africa and I told her how it was going to be my legacy and I remember she told me, ‘not so fast’,” Oprah remembered.

She said how Angelou told her that your legacy is every woman that every watched your show and decided to go back to school and she listed several other examples before saying, “Your legacy is every person you ever touched.”

“I can’t fill her shoes, but I can walk in her footsteps,” 
– Oprah

Some of the remarks from the celebration: 

"My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus blood and righteousness" Cicely Tyson reflects on her 50 yr bond with #MayaAngelou

"She spoke her mind, no matter what the situation was," -Tyson on #MayaAngelou

Bobby Jones from BET Gospel morning show sings "Just a Closer Walk with Thee" - song he sang with #MayaAngelou

Friends and family are now serenaded by beautiful lyrics to "I Hope you Dance" #MayaAngelou

"Mr. Wake Forest" himself Ed Wilson now at the podium to speak about his relationship #MayaAngelou and her teachings at @WakeForest1834

"Whatever it is, you have the courage and faith to know, God put a rainbow in the clouds." Oprah remembers something #MayaAngelou told her.

"Maya Angelou is the greatest woman I have ever known." @Oprah says about #MayaAngelou

Grandson acknowledges Wake Forest University and says famous #MayaAngelou quote ".....People will never forget how you made them feel."

- LINK TO PROGRAM: http://mayaangelou.wfu.edu/files/maya-angelou-program1.pdf

*I am only a writer that has lost her literary idol. As a Wake Forest University graduate, I just wanted to honor a fellow member of the WFU family. Tweeting and writing was the only way that I knew how to share the celebration of the life of Dr. Maya Angelou. You will be missed. - Brittney S. Knox

Instruments of Freedom

Out of my heart pours a sea of hope, desires, passions

But my heart is silenced and only my hands can speak.

The vocal cords are the bones that run from the tips of my phalanges, to the soles of my feet, because you see when I write – it’s from my core.

You know, that thing, that gives you life and has a rhythm beat after beat,

That thing that when you don’t feel love back – you go weak, 
you know that thing.

Thinking about how I think with my hands – 
and how with my hands I can work a type of magic beyond Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie and even 
Mr. Potter himself.

I can travel thousands of places and merely, never leave a room.

Not by the twitch of my nose, or by flying away straddling a broom.

Just as now my heart is heavy filled with passion, pain, thoughts about

Love, life and the pursuit of the pursuit of this intangible idea of happiness.

Because isn’t happiness only a state of mind anyways.

I think so in-depthly about how things work together for all those who love the Lord, 
but am I truly loving him like he loves me?

Am I nailed to the cross as he hung there for all to see?

My God, my Lord, there are more things wrong on this globe,

Than the things dancing across my mind – however, I mustn’t

leave them to perform their entire ballet internally- just for me.

I should use my hands as the medium, the intermediary, the middle man

Between me and this keyboard... this piece of paper –

Are only these ten instruments of freedom.  

~BK